← Steps

Step 5

We admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being the exact nature of our wrongs.

What it means

Saying it out loud to a real person is what takes the charge out. Shame does not survive being witnessed.

How abandonment distorts it

Telling someone the truth feels like handing them a reason to leave.

In this marriage

The person who hears this does not have to be my wife, and in this season it usually should not be.

Inside me

I have no inner voice to say this to. That is exactly why it must be said ALOUD, to a person, in a room.

Do not do this for 0 minutes
  • Do not use Step Five as a confession to your wife aimed at getting reassurance. That is reassurance-seeking with a program label on it.
Behavioral exercise
  1. Book the conversation with a sponsor or trusted person. Put it in the calendar before you feel ready.